October 18, 2004
Living a Lie
I give up.
I gave it my best shot, but I came to the conclusion this weekend, after MUCH soul searching and letting go of emotional baggage, that I am not, and have no desire to be a distance runner.
I'm done.
There, I've said it.
Wow... I feel a LOT better. Please don't take this to mean that I feel I haven't accomplished anything these last few months, because I have... I have run further than I ever imagined I could. And I will still run the half on the 31st, but until then, I am not doing any more long training runs. If I never (other than the race) run a distance greater than 10k ever again in my life, I'm OK with that. Running is an amazing wonderful thing, but right now, in my life and with my fitness goals, it just doesn't fit. It takes too much time to run 10 miles... it severely increases my appetite to the point that I've GAINED weight (and no, it is not muscle) and lost muscle... it hurts my knees and my hips and my feet when done for great distances and with relative frequency... and I'm just not having fun anymore.
So there you have it. Every other aspect of my fitness has suffered while I've been exclusively running and I am done. I don't like waking up dreading my daily workout... I want to anticipate it with baited-breath again. I want to pump my muscles up and "feel the burn" and not just burnt-out. This doesn't mean I will never run again. It just means no more distances of greater than an hour. I'd like to improve my 5k time... and possibly even my 10k time... a lot of that can be done with treadmill work and fartlek and such. It's the distance I'm letting go of, not the running itself.
Maybe my attitude will change in the spring. I don't know. What I do know is that I feel perfectly capable of running the half marathon at my current running fitness level, so I will run some shorter daily runs, not anything further than an hour until the race is here, and when it's done. I'm done. And in case you hadn't guessed... I did not run 12 this weekend. I did not run at all, in fact.
I'm also going back to the gym for some real lifting starting this week... I'll get to post sets and reps again (YIPPEE!!!) and I'm going to get back on the scale... (blech) because I need the slap in the face that I am certain it will be.
cheers!
Posted by Lexy at October 18, 2004 08:31 AM
Comments
I came to a lot of the same conclusions while training for a marathon. Running for 4 hours kinda shoots the rest of your day, then you have to plan every other workout around that one run... I totally understand. At least you've tried it an KNOW it's not for you. How many people even try it?
Posted by: neca on 10/18/04 @ 09:08 AM
You're not alone in your sentiments about long distance running... I feel the exact same way.
Posted by: Laura on 10/18/04 @ 09:28 AM
Yeah, the whole point of making exercise a lifestyle is finding things that are enjoyable. So I think your decision is completely justified and wise.
Posted by: Megan on 10/18/04 @ 10:02 AM
Yeah, like *I'm* going to come out in favor of running...but the point, I think is that you wanted to do this as a change-up...and you did...and it worked out better than you thought it would (you have, you know, exceeded expectations [yours] at every turn)
My knees will throb a goodbye...
Until, of course, we start doing skwatz...(!)
Posted by: Jim (a.k.a. the Mighty Slug of Thunder) on 10/18/04 @ 12:02 PM
I think it's really cool and brave that you made this post about not doing distance running. It's so excellent, because it continues to show that you know that one size doesn't fit all. You're certainly progressing in all these different avenues of your life. It's great to know when one isn't right for your overall plans.
Best of luck with weight training. Can't wait to see what the Lexy reboot brings!
Posted by: Chris Brogan... on 10/18/04 @ 12:08 PM
i guess i'm the one naysayer on this. i think it sucks dinger you won't be doing distance anymore, but more for my own selfish reasons than for any that relate to the quality of your training and where you are emotionally concerning your fitness. i had great notions of you joining up with my motley running crew and maybe, just maybe, doing a marathon one of these days.
but you're right-- distance running takes a HUGE amount of time, training, and cognitive processor cycles. to commit to all of that when you're not even enjoying it seems like a poor use of your limited time. and pain ain't good for nobody, nawsuh.
i am glad you'll still do the half. i'll be there with you every step of the way!
Posted by: hollie on 10/18/04 @ 12:23 PM
Brenna, I hear ya. I'm finding distance running really time consuming and sleepy-making (which is why I took a month-long break from it while getting used to being back in school). But I like it more than I liked swimming and lifting weights, so I'm gonna try to stick it out. I think Megan's right- enjoyment is key. There are so many things you love to do that aren't distance running, so there's no reason to focus solely on that. Have a good time at the half-marathon :)
Posted by: nuni on 10/18/04 @ 10:57 PM
Thanks for the acknowledgement in one of the recent posts. Very nice of you. Makes me want to drop by more frequently. I can't believe I read your ENTIRE archive in the last week (when I should have been sleeping). I have a lot of respect for what you've accomplished.
I think it's great that you tried something new but when it didn't fit you knew when to say "enough". If you don't like running long distances then don't do it. There are too many different paths to fitness and I agree that the most important thing is to enjoy what you do.
I'm not a runner either (yes, I know I ran a marathon, but trust me on this). There are things I've learned to love about running but I'm not sure if I'll keep running long. As a side note, if you are experiencing pain then it could be the shoes, stride, footstrike, method of training, or one of many other variables. Many of these are controllable, correctable, or alterable. Because my knees used to hurt when I ran any distance over 3 miles I used to think that I couldn't run longer distances. Wrong. My knees hurt because I was in crappy shoes that didn't meet my particular needs (pronation) and my stride and footstrike were all screwed up. After correction my knees never hurt again (never that is, until the marathon). Of course, it is also possible that there's a real physiological reason that you are experiencing pain (yes, I hear you Jim) and if you keep running you'll do real damage.
The most important thing is to do something that feels right, something you enjoy. I love biking and rollerblading, and during winter, indoor rowing. So I plan to do a lot of those activities. And I'm going to get back into lifting again as soon as we can move the wine out of the basement area where the weights would go (but we do have some nice 2000 Bordeauxs!).
But whether I'm biking, running, lifing, or rowing, I still have to remember to put the shoes on. Three days ago I wanted to exercise but it was rainy and cold. Actually, I didn't want to exercise. I wanted to take a nap. But I hadn't done much since the marathon and I was feeling sluggish so I thought I should move my butt. I was a little worried about some residual knee pain from the marathon so I decided that I should hit the Concept II rower instead of running. Unfortunately, I kept finding excuses and I procrastinated until the workout was not possible anymore. The next day, my birthday, I began to do the same thing. Finally, I got mad and told myself: "Just go upstairs and put the f----g shoes on. Then row only as far as you want to. But put the shoes on and sit down. NOW." I put the shoes on. I'd been running a lot and I hadn't rowed in a while so I wasn't sure what I could do on the rower. Well, on my 43rd birthday I set a personal best 30 minute row. I was scorching fast. Well, it was fast for me, anyway. No, I take that back. I was fast for real -- 75th percentile for males at my age on the Concept II rower log. I'm still happy about that. And I was becoming lazy today again but I made myself put the shoes on. Putting the shoes on is the hardest part because you are fighting a universe of inertia. It's the moment when you make the commitment to move and do something about your current state of affairs.
On a different point, hey, if you want to feel the burn while doing cardio, here's something "fun" to try. See if your workout place has a Concept 2 rower (it can't be any old rower, it has to be a good one and Concept 2s are the best). If it does have a good rower, then try this:
1. 5 minute warmup (very slow pace)
2. 5 minute HIIT cycles
-2 min sustained high intensity (HI) breath-sucking, lungs exploding, maximum pace
-2 min med-slow pace (whew, recovery)
-1/2 min HI pace (when did two minutes ever go by so fast?)
-1/2 min slow pace (change grip if you wish)
3. Repeat 2 for 5 cycles if you can (25 minutes never felt so intense). Don't worry if your HI pace drops over time. Just kick it up as high as you can sustain.
4. 5 minute cool down (very slow pace)
If you try it, let me know how you like it. If you are a non-rower, please try not to whimper when discussing the experience. :-)
It works the forearms, biceps, quads, and hamstrings while providing a peachy keen-o cardio workout. And no knee pounding.
Damn. Now I'm gonna have to set up my own blog or I'll fill yours with my drivel. Sorry, don't mean to trespass. Hope you don't mind if I drop a longer post in the comments. Tell me to stop and I will.
Posted by: BD on 10/19/04 @ 09:14 PM
Bravo. running has its place in any w/o schedule: but not exclusively.
sing hey for the pump and grind. Deadlifts, anyone? :)
but no. I don't believe you gained weight w/ all that running? tell us it ain't so.
Posted by: rachel on 10/20/04 @ 02:43 AM
I love your honesty, Brenna... and I agree, if running isn't fun (for the most part) and rewarding, if you start to dread it every day... then it's not for you. Goodluck with your half!
Posted by: Dani on 10/20/04 @ 05:18 AM

The main thing is to keep progressing, and to have a good time while doing so. I hope that you meet - and exceed - your personal fitness goals, no matter how you get there!
Posted by: Richard on 10/18/04 @ 09:00 AM